Spiritual Directors International Announcements

There’s a New World Coming

liz — Wed, 01 May 2013 20:19:37 -0400

“There’s a new world coming,” Dr. Barbara Holmes told us during the community event in St. Paul, Minnesota, USA. Hundreds of people gathered to learn from her how mystical ways are passed on in black family traditions. When Holmes played Bernice Johnson Reagon’s music, “There’s a New World Coming,” the song’s rhythm sank into my ears and my bones. Throughout the conference, the refrain, “There’s a new world coming. Where will you be standing when it comes?” stayed with me.

Holmes personalized her story about spiritual direction in the mystical legacies of black women by letting us know that the following morning she would be burying her mother. The ballroom quieted as we held Holmes in her grief. Many of us met Holmes’s mother during the Tributaries of Compassion gathering last October. Her mother gazed with pride and gentle strength when Dr. B—as students at United Theological Seminary call their new president—shared her passionate response to a Langston Hughes poem.

The bond of love and deep respect between mother and daughter filled the room with a sense of purpose back in October. Dr. B.’s compassionate mother was witnessing her daughter live into her dream of becoming a leader in her new city and in her innovative role as seminary president. On stage in April, Dr. B offered kindness and gratitude to her beloved mother—for passing along her faith and compassion that she so freely shares with others. There’s a new world coming.

Another mother, daughter—and grandmother—touched my heart during the conference: Christine Luna Munger, the chair of the local host committee. Because her baby is only five months old, Christine invited her mother to look after daughter, Elisa, between nursing and napping. Elisa is pictured here soaking up lots of attention from volunteers who helped Christine make the conference a very meaningful event. I don’t remember an SDI conference with so many generations all in one place. There’s a new world coming.

There is one more mother to acknowledge, even though her novices are not biological kin: Kathleen McAlpin, RSM, who celebrated her golden jubilee during the conference. For fifty years, Kathleen has been tending her relationship with God as a sister of Mercy. She had just returned from the Philippines caring for the spiritual formation of young novices in one of the poorest regions of the Philippines. We had a good time listening to Kathleen’s nurturing stories while indulging in cake.

Yes. There’s a new world coming, and I am blessed to be standing among some of the best mothers on the planet.

Reflection:
As you celebrate May Day and Mother’s Day, what are you noticing about a new world coming? Where will you be standing when it comes?

With Hope You Can Always Go On

sdijennifer — Mon, 01 Apr 2013 17:39:59 -0400

Teenage feet. Female feet. Muslim feet. Atheist feet. Dark feet. Light feet. The tattooed feet of a prisoner. These are the feet the newly elected Pope Francis chose to wash on Maundy Thursday.

It takes courage and humility to ignore liturgical laws and break with tradition to wash and kiss the feet of twelve juvenile offenders in a detention center instead of washing the feet of twelve priests in the basilica. It’s the kind of courage grounded in love that Jesus modeled throughout his ministry. By turning upside down our staid assumptions about how the world works, we are freed to imagine new ways of being in relationship.

Washing someone’s feet is a tender act. Kissing a stranger’s feet is an intimate act. Seeing photos of Pope Francis compassionately tending to the young prisoners’ feet brought tears for me. Rather than preaching in a basilica about scripture, the poor, and the marginalized, Francis demonstrated with his actions the love and hope that Jesus exhibited.

Francis explained to the young people at the detention center on Maundy Thursday, "This is a symbol, it is a sign; washing your feet means I am at your service. Help one another. This is what Jesus teaches us. This is what I do. And I do it with my heart. I do this with my heart because it is my duty, as a priest and bishop I must be at your service."

Can you imagine being in the shoes of one of those teenagers? Here comes a seventy-something, gray-haired guy—a religious leader which doesn’t mean much to you as an atheist—who offers to wash your feet. You’ve agreed to participate because it might help your probation. The old man kneels on the stone floor in a vulnerable position beneath you. You are comfortably seated on a bench overlooking him.

As you take off your sneakers, it dawns on you that your feet don’t smell very good. No matter. You are perhaps a tough, street-smart, hard-hearted dude. Yet when the old man touches your feet ever so gently and pours warm water over your calloused heals, you notice that it feels good to be cared for. After drying your toes tenderly with a soft clean towel, he bends to kiss your feet. Then searchingly, he looks you in the eye, saying, "Don't lose hope. Understand? With hope you can always go on." He hands you an Easter egg as a gift.

What a beautiful inspiration for April, for Passover, and for Easter season. Every day, opportunities arise for us to be courageously hopeful. As spiritual directors, we are called to be of service in our world, to stand with and for our loving and compassionate God. May we cultivate compassion by companioning seekers with the courage to say, “Don’t lose hope. With hope you can always go on.”

Reflection: What staid assumptions can you turn upside down to discover new ways of being in relationship with others? What stories inspire your hope? Share your response below.

Encounter Mystery

sdijennifer — Fri, 01 Mar 2013 18:04:17 -0500

Did you know that the saguaro cactus only grows in the Sonoran Desert of Mexico and the United States? Pilgrims in the recent SDI Interfaith Pilgrimage: Exploring the Spirit of the Desert learned that the arms of the saguaro do not emerge until the cactus has lived about sixty-five years, and some saguaros live to be two hundred years old.

“Imagine if we saw our lives as beginning at age sixty-five with many more limbs to grow and heights to climb,” one pilgrim remarked. It was a freeing invitation to consider how the saguaro offers a new perspective on living.

Stripped of everyday distractions, pilgrims looked more closely at their surroundings and listened deeply to God’s guidance in the desert wilderness. A pilgrim who considers herself a “coastal ocean person” noticed she was genuinely attracted to the odd shape and beautiful presence of the saguaro. Simply standing next to the saguaro gave her a sense of deep peace and connection with the cactus and all of God’s creation.

Another pilgrim had never experienced being in the desert and was a bit wary of the dangers: rattlesnakes and scorpions kept her aware of where she stepped, even when coming across them was unlikely during hibernation. She mentioned how the heightened attentiveness helped her notice the desert’s teeming life—chatty cactus wrens, ancient petroglyphs carved into rocks by Native people, and dozens of strangely alluring cactus. She risked entering the unknown to discover beauty amidst the hazards.

When we pray with Jesus wandering in the desert for forty days and Moses leading his people in the desert for forty years, we mostly contemplate the loneliness, the barrenness, the temptations, and the hardship that was endured. We connect with a universal fear of abandonment that the desert evokes.

Being in the desert, however, provided opportunities for us to feel the mystery of God’s ever-present love, especially as a contemplative community entering Lent and in preparation for Passover, Easter, and the equinox. Even in the desert—or perhaps most especially in the metaphorical deserts of our lives—intimacy with our loving creator beckons. God cannot help God’s self from drawing us deeper into a loving presence that abides everywhere and always. Our God longs to set all beings free from bondage and be present to our fears of abandonment. In this sacred season, may we companion people as they encounter Mystery and respond with loving kindness for all.

Reflection:

How have you encountered Mystery in the deserts of your life? In what ways do Passover, Easter, and the tilt of the earth’s axis at the equinox encourage you to move closer to trusting your encounters with Mystery?

Love Tastes Sweet

sdijennifer — Fri, 01 Feb 2013 18:17:41 -0500

I know it’s February, yet I can’t get the Christmas hymn “O Come Let Us Adore Him” out of my head. That’s because a dear friend recently adopted a beautiful Russian baby girl named Carina, and my husband and I are part of Carina’s new extended family of “aunties” and “uncles” who truly do adore her.

Something about Carina and her relationship with her new mother embodies divine love. Tingles run up my spine when I pause to consider the awesome power of love that brought together my friend and her new child. It’s the kind of love that is borne out of the deepest desire of a single childless woman, agonizing loneliness, years of hopeful prayer, bureaucratic hard work, and excruciating delays. It’s the kind of love that requires trust and surrender to God’s miraculous way: my friend’s willingness to accept an abandoned baby girl as her own and Carina’s willingness to accept her new mother and new home.

For her birthday, Carina’s mother invited extended aunties, uncles, and cousins for a little celebration. Turning two years old became a love-fest.

My second favorite memory of the birthday party was when Carina’s mother patiently showed her how to play with a bright pink party horn. Initially Carina looked confused—what do I do with this thing that I put in my mouth but can’t eat? Soon she discovered that by blowing into it she uncurled the long pink paper tube and made a sound: Toot! Toot!

Watching Carina tour the room looking for play partners who also had colorful party horns was better than any comedy show or entertainment channel. With big brown eyes filled with delight, she toddled from auntie to uncle and to every newly adopted cousin to practice blowing the curly pink horn into their faces and to be tickled in return with purple and pink horns tooted back.

My most favorite memory of Carina’s birthday was when it came time to blow out the candle atop her homemade chocolate birthday cake. We all gathered around Carina who was sitting on her mother’s lap. As we started singing “Happy Birthday,” mother showed Carina how not to touch the hot flame, but instead to gently blow out the candle. As the candle smoke rose like incense up toward heaven, a steady stream of tears—pure joy—flowed down my friend’s cheeks. Looking around the room filled with love and adoration, she told Carina, “This is all for you.”

Carina looked up into her mother’s eyes with a twinkle and then placed her hand smack dab onto the top of the cake scooping up chocolate frosting and licking every finger before going back for more.

Reflection:

As spiritual directors, we are given the opportunity to offer unconditional love to the people God sends us to companion. What memories do you have of a time when God’s love for you and your spiritual companion was made visible?

Become the Light

sdijennifer — Mon, 07 Jan 2013 16:38:06 -0500

Light takes thousands of forms. At this time of year in Seattle, Washington, USA, the light is low in the sky. Even at midday, the sun casts long, gray shadows.

While visiting family in southern California, USA, for the Christmas holidays, I noticed the sun sits much higher in the sky. On cloudless nights, even though it’s dark, the stars are brilliant. New Year’s Eve, we gazed at the starry fragments of light—brilliant specks—each one representing the brightness of the sun. Some of the brightest stars are actually planets, reflecting the light of the sun, not creating their own light.

People represent light too. Sometimes all we see is a glimmer, only because we are too far away to see the sun they embody. Some of us have light we cover up, keeping the brilliance hidden. How do we express the light we represent?

Following the horrific gang rape in India, a Delhi woman commented, “That girl could have been any of us…. We can only tackle this by becoming Durga.” Curious to learn more about the Hindu goddess Durga, I discovered that the essence of Durga’s power is light.

Our Hindu brothers and sisters use many words to describe her: humble warrior Durga, fiercely compassionate Durga, and brilliant Durga.

These words also describe what is needed in spiritual companionship today. The world needs your servant leadership and spiritual companionship as a fiercely compassionate, brilliant, humble warrior. You embody and reflect a light that attracts, inspires, and connects seekers to their own light and a light much greater than can be named or described.

Reflection:

In 2013, what spiritual practices will help you become the light that is needed in our world today? How will you, in solidarity with our brothers and sisters in India and around the world, become Durga? In your own spiritual tradition, what is your intention this year to reflect the light of your own spirituality and to companion others to share their light?

Grandmother of God

sdijennifer — Fri, 30 Nov 2012 14:29:41 -0500

“The grandmother of God?” I asked.

“Yes,” she replied. “Saint Ann is considered the grandmother of God—the mother of Mary.” There was a pause on the telephone, and it was as if my heart had stopped. Something deep and visceral was moving inside of me at these words.

In the middle of our conversation—just after that pause—it felt as though this new SDI member was sitting just across from me, filling me in about her recent experiences in prayer. Even though we were thousands of miles apart, living in different countries, we experienced deep connection.

Together we imagined what the grandmother of Jesus might have been like: a devout Jewish mother, loving and compassionate, patient, and grateful for God’s gift of Mary. I particularly liked learning that Saint Ann is considered to be a legend, an unverifiable grandmother. The real grandmother of Jesus is a mystery.

Something opened up for me during our conversation. With excitement, I now feel a deeper generational connection with my faith and with all spiritual traditions. Certainly, in theology school and growing up I studied sacred scriptures describing the genealogy of Moses, King David, and the tree of Jesse. Yet, I don’t remember my heart ever being grabbed (or seized) by those long lists of lineage. My heart, however, was taken deeply by the grandmother of God.

Now I am curious to learn more about Buddha’s grandmother, Moses’s grandmother, and Mohammad’s grandmother. I did not find much by searching the Internet. This is the kind of discovery and learning that is best made through prayer, contemplation, and meeting with my spiritual director. In this sacred season, I will be praying with these amazing, hidden women who created the ultimate and definitive environment where agapé love would be born and eternally flourish. The fourteenth century mystic Meister Eckhart wrote, “What good is it to me if Mary gave birth to the Son of God fourteen hundred years ago and I do not also give birth to the Son of God in my time and in my culture? We are all meant to be Mothers of God."

This is my hope for spiritual companionship: to be “Grandmothers of God.” Spiritual direction is the hidden way, the invisible way that prepares people to become fully alive in an increasingly deeper transformative relationship with God beyond all names.

Recently I witnessed my mother-in-law with her two teenage grandsons when they returned from seeing the new film, Life of Pi. She wanted to hear all about it. They started to tell the tale of Pi, an Indian teenager stranded on a lifeboat with a tiger. As they told the story they sometimes missed critical details that made the exact story hard to follow. But their grandmother was not listening to understand the details of the movie. She was listening for how her grandsons were telling their stories. She created space for them to struggle with the myriad layers in Life of Pi. She was fully attentive as they pulled back the layers in their own revelations. No judgment. Patient encouragement. Pure love.

I wonder how the grandmother of Jesus listened to him when he was a teenager.

Reflection:
What grabs your heart as you enter this sacred season of Advent, Hanukkah, Christmas, and winter solstice? Who are the extraordinary, ordinary messengers being sent to help you grow closer to God?

Lessons as I Walk

sdijennifer — Wed, 31 Oct 2012 18:03:14 -0400

“Please wait here, at the edge of the rainforest,” the Australian Aboriginal guide requested of his pilgrims. “In my native language, I will ask the rainforest for the go-ahead to bring you inside.”

SDI’s newest Coordinating Council member, Kristen Hobby, relayed this story during the October Coordinating Council meeting. Hobby had recently returned from a family holiday in Queensland, where she was privileged to see through the eyes of the people who have been the custodians of the rainforest for tens of thousands of years. The Daintree is considered the oldest living rainforest on Earth. Hobby spoke about how the Australian Aboriginal guide had a way of listening deeply that informed her spiritual companionship ministry and service.

“After asking us to wait together at the forest edge, the guide walked alone—slowly and with care—to get closer to the trees,” Hobby explained. “He entered silence before petitioning the forest for permission to bring his fellow travelers inside. He assured the forest we were friends and that we would not stay long.”

Hobby told us he then paused for a yawning moment, listening for a response from the forest.

“His patience and respect for the land, for the trees, for the birds and animals that live in the rainforest touched me and my young daughter profoundly,” Hobby said. Through the wind, the sounds of birds, and the trickling waters of nearby streams, the rainforest offered an affirmative response for the pilgrims to enter the vast rainforest. They continued learning as they walked, practicing to listen deeply to all of creation.

SDI member Kristen Hobby and daughter Isabella in the
Daintree Rainforest. Photographs provided by the Hobby family.

Hobby’s story reminded me of an inspirational poem by Aboriginal poet Bee Lake, shared during the 2009 Parliament of the World’s Religions in Melbourne, Australia:

Forever Oneness,

who sings to us in silence,

who teaches us through each other.

Guide my steps with strength and wisdom.

May I see the lessons as I walk,

honor the Purpose of all things.

Help me touch with respect,

always speak from behind my eyes.

Let me observe, not judge.

May I cause no harm,

and leave music and beauty after my visit.

When I return to forever

may the circle be closed

and the spiral be broader.

In the near future, Spiritual Directors International will be offering a pilgrimage. As interfaith pilgrims we will enter, with respect and hope of learning, into the desert of the American Southwest. From February 11-19, 2013, we will listen deeply to the Spirit of the Desert. In many spiritual traditions, spiritual guides step away from everyday life and enter the wilderness, the rainforest, or the desert, to grow spiritually. Will you join SDI in February to learn from the Spirit of the Desert?

Reflection:

How has nature taught you to listen deeply? How has nature been a transformational experience for the people you companion in spiritual direction?

God Hugs You

sdijennifer — Mon, 01 Oct 2012 17:20:36 -0400

Thank God for the spiritual directors of Saint Hildegard of Bingen! Throughout her life, Hildegard shared with spiritual directors her visions and messages from God. Hildegard wrote that she first saw "The Shade of the Living Light" at the age of three, and by the age of five she began to understand that she was experiencing visions, according to Evelyn Underhill in Mystics of the Church.

At age 42, Hildegard felt insecure about her writing and doubted a message she received from God to share her spiritual visions. To help her discern if the message came from God, she wrote to Bernard of Clairvaux for spiritual guidance. He encouraged Hildegard to take seriously God’s instruction to write down her experiences.

With spiritual encouragement and the help of scribes and illustrators, Hildegard began writing down everything. Her works include nine books, seventy poems, a morality play, and almost eighty soaringly soul-filled pieces of music.

Hildegard is pictured above in her illuminated work, Scivias, receiving visions, music, and the “voice of heaven.” She is dictating to her scribe what she heard from God. Two of my favorite phrases she heard: ”God hugs you. You are encircled by the arms of the mystery of God.” And, “From God all lights shine. Therefore, we remain a light that gives off light through God.”

Not only did Hildegard receive validation in spiritual direction for her spiritual experiences, but she also extended encouragement by offering spiritual guidance to another mystical visionary, Elizabeth of Schönau. Without spiritual discernment to trust the visions and voices, we would not today have the exquisite music and illustrated texts of Saint Hildegard and Elizabeth of Schönau.

On October 7, 2012, Pope Benedict XVI will declare Saint Hildegard of Bingen, to be the thirty-fifth Doctor of the Church. Saint Hildegard is one of four female Doctors of the Church: Saint Teresa of Avila and Saint Catherine of Siena were named Doctors of the Church in 1970; St. Therese of Lisieux was given the title in 1997. All four women made significant contributions to the ministry and service of spiritual direction.

In 2013, SDI will make an interfaith pilgrimage to the Rhine River in Germany to walk in the footsteps of Saint Hildegard. If you are interested in more information about the pilgrimage, contact Rose Slavkovsky, programs [at] sdiworld.org.

Reflection:

Watch and listen to this video of Hildegard’s music. What does the music say to your soul? How might you offer spiritual encouragement in your ministry and service of spiritual direction? Let the global learning community of spiritual directors know on the blog.

Entering Solitude

sdijennifer — Thu, 30 Aug 2012 17:22:21 -0400

Entering Solitude

A red door stands naked in a field. Is it art, I asked myself, driving down a country road on the way to my annual silent retreat. Not likely. What happened to the home around it and the people who lived there, I wondered.

Catching the red door in my rearview mirror, my thoughts shifted away from worrying about the people who once lived in the vanished home. I was drawn to something bigger. Standing upright, hinged to nothing but a door frame, the red door invited a new perspective on the meadow and forest beyond the door. I had to get closer.

Walking out to the red door, I smiled in gratitude: the whole scene was sent by God as an affirmation and a reminder of the value of contemplative retreats. Given the demands of work, aging parents, marriage, and community responsibilities, it was difficult to make a retreat this year. The whole scene seemed to be asking: would I have the courage to walk through the door of solitude and rest in the beauty of the trees and meadow?

Nurturing the soul by walking through the door of solitude takes initiative and courage. The choice is always ours. For months, my spiritual director kept gently asking, “What’s preventing you from giving yourself permission to ‘waste some time with God’ in silence, on retreat?” Finally, I allowed myself to return to a familiar hermitage on Whidbey Island, near Seattle, Washington, USA.

Douglas fir trees showed me again how to be still, how to look up and around—beyond the day-to-day worries and woes—allowing everything to arrive as it will. By the end of the week of walking, contemplating, sleeping, praying, eating healthy food, and meditating, I felt refreshed and more in tune with God’s ever present goodness and guidance.

Reflection:

When were you last on retreat? Are you spending enough time in silence?

Somewhere, a red door waits for you. Tend to your soul by making a retreat. Encourage the people you companion to make a retreat. Dream a little—where would you go? Retreat possibilities are numerous—including everyday life retreats, silent retreats, online retreats, and group retreats. If you need ideas about where to make a retreat, check out the listings in the back of Presence journal, look in Connections e-newsletter, or review the global resources in Listen. Consider the contemplative retreat following the April 2013 Spiritual Directors International conference in St. Paul, Minnesota, USA, to integrate your experience. Or go online to the Resources section of the Spiritual Directors International website for a searchable world map of retreat centers with spiritual direction. You will find opportunities all over the world to come home to your soul.

Share your retreat stories in the comments section below.

Thank you for Carrying the Torch

sdijennifer — Tue, 31 Jul 2012 12:17:03 -0400

Thank you for Carrying the Torch

Did you know that the Olympic torch relay through the United Kingdom was so carefully planned that almost every person in the UK was within one hour of its route? Imagine if we as spiritual directors wanted to make spiritual accompaniment that accessible. What would it take to create a world where everyone knew where to find a spiritual companion within one hour of his or her location?

Did you know that not only former Olympic athletes but also thousands of locals who demonstrated dedication to the “the building of a harmonious society” were nominated by their communities to be torchbearers? Carrying the torch is a great honor, and this year, eight thousand unique carriers participated in the eight-hundred mile relay. It’s inspiring to see who communities selected to carry the torch like the Paralympic athlete, Ade Adepitan, who escorted the flame across the Millennium Bridge in London (with Saint Paul Cathedral in the background pictured above) and a centenarian great-grandmother of six, Diana Gould, who was surprised to learn that her granddaughter nominated her to walk with her cane and the flame through Kenton.

Imagine if we as spiritual companions championed people in our communities who we noticed had the gifts of spiritual companionship and helped them to find enrichment and training for their talents. How might each of us carry the torch of spirituality in a way that welcomes seekers of all ages and cultures to discover how close the flame of spirituality burns in every human heart?

As spiritual companions, we are torchbearers of an ancient tradition that is being re-imagined for today. The fire of spirituality burns brightly and requires tending for the future. I am delighted to report that three of the six New Contemplatives in the inaugural cohort will be offering workshops at Cultivating Compassion on the River in St. Paul, Minnesota, USA. In the near future, SDI will launch a new scholarship fund to support the New Contemplatives Initiative. These are concrete ways that Spiritual Directors International is carrying the ministry of spiritual direction into the next generation.

Thank you for the many ways you demonstrate your dedication to building a world filled with peace and for carrying the torch of compassion through your ministry and service of spiritual direction.

Reflection: How do you notice the charism or gifts of spiritual companionship in your community, and how do you encourage people to tend to their gifts through formation and training?